The Lost Connection, I Can't Read You.

Hey, this post will be quite funny, some parts may get a bit "creepy", but just grab your popcorn and enjoy.

We all know I have Aspergers, with Aspergers I can't read body/facial language... I can't read the built in language

What does that mean?.. well... it means I don't know anything about body/facial  language, if you're trying to send clues of wanting to change subject, or something like that, if I been talking about a certain topic for awhile and you're tried of hearing it, I won't catch onto your  majestic language hahaha.... :p....

Oh man, just imagine flirting and someone giving me the "clues/moves" that they actually like me. If that would even happen?, hahaha, if it does even happen, I won't noticed it.

You might be thinking that nonverbal communication isn't really that important, that you'll be able to live without it... well..

" How much of communication is really nonverbal?

One of the most frequently quoted statistics on nonverbal communication is that 93% of all daily communication is nonverbal. Popular science magazines, students and media outlets frequently quote this specific number.

So where does the number come from? Dr. Albert Mehrabian, author of Silent Messages, conducted several studies on nonverbal communication. He found that 7% of any message is conveyed through words, 38% through certain vocal elements, and 55% through nonverbal elements (facial expressions, gestures, posture, etc).  Subtracting the 7% for actual vocal content leaves one with the 93% statistic.

However, studying human behavior is a challenging task. The inherent flaws of social scientific research methodology combined with the incredible dynamic nature of human behavior make this specific quantification close to impossible.

The fact of the matter is that the exact number is irrelevant. Knowing that communication is specifically 75% nonverbal or 90% nonverbal holds no practical applications. The important part is that most communication is nonverbal. In fact, nonverbal behavior is the most crucial aspect of communication.

Based on my own research, I would state that the amount of communication that is nonverbal varies between 60 and 90% on a daily basis.  This number depends on both the situation and the individual."

^ The study

Well... crap... 60 to 90% on a daily basis. How can anyone live without feeling totally... disconnected with people?, easy answer, they don't. even with my friends who I crack jokes with

My friend Levi is a good example, I crack jokes with him a lot, I give him a lot of smart alec comments which we'll just laugh about. but at the end of the day, I am still missing the full connection.

That is why I like texting or facebook.. there is no body/facial expressions, just words, no eye contact, I also like talking to people in person because.. it's just nice. the online friends I have told about me and Aspergers, are always like "But you don't seem like nothing is wrong with you" which is because we just talk through a screen, if we were in person, they would be able to pick it up quite quickly.

A few weeks ago my sister who's 16, will be 17 next month, anyways. she was... giving me a test
She would display facial expressions and have me guess what they were, If the "test" had a grade, it would be a F-. I got about 2 right out of... a lot.. :p.

I thought "Confused" was "Concerned" and so on, the only two I got right were Happy, and Sad.
So great, I'll know if you're happy or sad, but in between, heck to the no.

Me and my same sister went and got frozen yogurt a few months ago, and we were sitting in the car. she told me *About the cashier*  "You can tell everything about that person, just by his facial expressions" I looked.. a few seconds later I said "Nope :|" she asked why and I simply said "Aspergers" and we both laughed.

Alright, now to get into the "creepy" part of this post. when I'm watching a Movie/TV/Youtube (Mainly just Youtube, because I do that by myself, vs watching movies with people)  and I'm looking at people faces.. I pause, go back and watch their faces again, I repeat this time after time, just last night I did it about 7-10 times on just one person and his facial expression. I would pause it right at his face, and I would try to "study" it, I would look everywhere on his face. after the 10th try, I just gave up and let the video go on.

If I could have some sort of power, that'd be it.. to freeze time, I would just look at all of your faces closely, and try to figure it out, try to study it, to even see if I could tell anything about it.
You can't just go up to people and be like "Let me study your face, don't move" because not only would that be insanely creepy... well yeah, it'd just be creepy, let leave it at that, haha.

To end this blog post, I'm glad I can share my experience with Aspergers, that I'm more open about it with people, it's apart of me, and I have been more accepting of it myself as the years go on.




                              Endure to the end, stay strong in the Gospel and you won't regret it